101 bullets is published

After several false starts throughout the years, I finished a short 3d game.

My biggest mistake was trying to start something from the ground up.
I've tried with low-level programming (ANSI C) and learning computer graphics (Allegro/SDL).
I could easily make 2d Tetris clones but could come nowhere near my ideas for projects.

The next false start was Macromedia Flash.
I found out I could make decent mini games but by the time I got a 3d prototype working,
the entire plugin and ecosystem were being dismantled.

Real life and work made it impossible to dedicate the same amount of time I had used up for my previous attempts,
so I started hoarding HumbleBundles for Game Development.
Fortunately, I quickly realized with CryEngine I was going down another obsolete technology rabbit-hole but Unreal or Unity were too time demanding to get right.

At this point things became pretty bleak in my personal life, not because of my projects but rather because of disorders and diseases which affected people close to me.
As pandemics and wars erupted, I realized I have little control over many things and my many ideas of games seemed rather pointless.

As a form of escape and self-therapy, I picked an obsolete game-engine on purpose and tried to adapt one of my oldest game-design documents.
The more things fell apart, the easier it felt to let go of my initial vision.

• multiple levels - after seeing it crash on the first one, I condensed the story
• different enemies - the existing models or the custom ones were so inadequate, I chose to make them shadows
• scripted events - since even the AI stopped working, only a peaceful run can be done
• the WW2 realism - since it couldn't be achieved, I went for a Starry Night on the Moon dream feel
• cinematics and voiceovers - after giving up on all the visuals, the music and ominous breathing became the core

The game itself is just a shadow of what I had in mind but that makes it much better.
My initial idea was never about the bullets themselves but the realization of what they do.
The number was intentionally chosen to lull the player into safety,
because it is usually used as a marketing gimmick or an introductory class.
Just like in 1984, 101 was meant to confront the preconceived notion of safety and what is true human nature.
The game breaking itself and becoming an eerie reflection actually mirrors the stories within.

For me there is peace and tranquility within this game.
The past is not forgotten and some spirits were laid to rest.